Game Over
by Sapphire2007
Summary: POST  EP  FIC Human Error, which was a huge challenge. Cuddy is trying to figure out what House's motives are for his recent change in behavior.
1. There's something in the air

_**+ Game over +**_

_I .There's something in the air_

The tunes of the song reached his ears, numbed his soul that for once had stopped aching.  
His fingers were softly brushing the strings of the guitar almost like they were tightrobe dancers airily balancing between life and death.  
He had his eyes closed and felt completely relaxed and calm.  
This felt right. Wilson had been right: Sometimes a change made all the difference.

The knock on his door didn't reach his mind at first. Or at least, he didn't allow it to reach his mind.  
When the second and the third knock turned more forceful though, he knew that he wouldn't be able to ignore this unwelcome guest.  
His fingers stopped and he laid his hand flat against the guitar strings, suffocating the music, turning it into deafening silence within a second.

He froze when he opened the door and didn't find himself facing Wilson as expected but Cuddy.

"I called for a blonde in a naughty officer's costume and they're sending me a brunette in a hospital administrator's outfit ? Dilettantes !" He growled at her and she furrowed her brow at him in return.

"I brought those legs you like so much", she teased him softly and looked at him sternly at the same time.

"Somehow I get the feeling that you didn't come here for the pleasure of adult entertainment", he snarled.

She sensed how the time window that he granted her before he would slam the door shut in her face once again was closing and moved forward.

"Can I come in ?" she therefore more demanded than asked while she was already crossing his threshold forcing him to step back to let her in.

"I'm not going to cave in", he declared, still holding the door open as if hoping for her to turn around and leave at this statement.

But she didn't even think of leaving him again, thus proceeding until she was standing in the center of his living room and turned around, looking so strangely unfamiliar in this place, his own private hideaway.  
She seemed so much smaller outside her hospital.  
The warm sandy colors of her outfit matched the brown shades of his furniture, and she almost appeared to melt into the ambience where he could still feel the music of his guitar lingering.

"I know. But that's not what I'm here for", she replied.

He frowned and wondered whether he had sensed some kind of allure in her voice.

She looked around and instantly spotted the guitar leaning against the wall.  
It had been a long time since she had been in here and actually nothing had changed.  
Nothing except for this guitar.

She looked back up at him, willing to fight as always, but shook her head in defeat when she understood that there was nothing to fight about because she wasn't even mad at him.  
She had been mad but it had for some reason been washed away the very minute she had entered his apartment.  
It irritated her to see him so calm, almost light, and she wondered whether that was a good sign or only the foreshadowing of some kind of breakdown that would follow this.  
It had been an incredibly rough year for him, for everyone actually who had been around him.

But he seemed to be fine for now. And maybe she should just leave it that way.

So she nodded.

"I get it", she finally gave in. "You needed a change. It's natural that people need a break after having worked together so closely for three years. God knows I could need a break from you, too."

She paused and looked at him, waiting for him to say something. But he didn't. So she continued, feeling a little self-conscious and out of place because she was obviously shadow boxing.

"Though I am still the boss here. I always make the final calls that haven't been made yet in this issue."

She fixed her gaze on him feeling how her feet were losing their ground.

He seemed to be miles away.  
He looked down and finally let go off the doorknob, slamming the door shut with a tired movement.

Obviously she was worried, even though she would never admit that.  
And she wouldn't go away unless he prove her that there was no reason to be worried.

"If you think you can force me to work with them by hiring them again –" he started the fight she was trying to provoke to make sure nothing had changed.

But she interrupted him.

"Nobody can 'force' you to do anything, you're a grown-up. At least according to law", she added. "But you do need fellows if you want to keep your department…"

Her voice faded and she closed her eyes, raising her hand, massaging her left temple with her fingers that then glid down on her cheek and came to a rest in the back of her neck.  
She felt sore and tired and envied House.  
Because she also felt like firing the world, firing her whole life.  
She also felt in the mood for a drastic change.  
And she was not at all in the mood for fighting.

Their eyes met again.

"Is this a midlife crisis ?" she calmly asked him, barely audible, almost smiling at that question herself.

But to her own surprise he simply replied "Maybe" and limped towards the couch, letting himself fall down onto it.

She turned around and looked down at him.

One possible drastic change would be to just break that pattern that she had got used to to protect herself from him.  
But breaking that pattern would now feel like a liberation and it had actually never seemed so easy before.  
Because he had broken his pattern already, by firing Chase, by letting Cameron go, by yelling at Foreman. And by showing her his jealousy, that he still considered her his territory, after all these years.

But maybe that was only one of his phases. Maybe he was just going through something, just like she had gone through this phase of wanting to have a child.  
All she had to do was to allow him some space for this until it was over.  
She owed him that.

"Well, then tell me when you're done", she therefore finally said, simply and wearily.

He looked up and nodded at her but not without noticing the subtle and unexpected change in her strategy. Obviously his change in behavior had the effect of flipping a domino.

There was a glint in his eyes that made her heart skip a beat. Because it told her to go.  
At the same time asking her to stay, asking for closeness, for someone who could hear the music in his head.

Her eyes looked at the guitar again.

She had heard him before she had knocked on his door. It had been a light and smooth melody and she was sure it had been one of his self-composed songs, speaking the words his mouth couldn't utter.

"It's nice. Was time you got a new one", she said when the memory of the music was fading again.

She smiled at him, faintly.

And then she left.

He closed his eyes, his nose sensing the light scent of her perfume lingering in the air along with the music that was still echoing in his head.

This was the reason why she was still in his life whereas others kept stepping in and out of it:  
Because she always walked away from him just when he was making a step towards her, so that in the end they never moved apart.  
It was like playing tag, like hide and seek.

Though at the moment it felt more like hit and run.


	2. All out

_II. All out_

A week later

She let the ball roll back and forth between her hands as she was dreaming herself away, sitting on his chair in his deserted office.  
Her eyes rested on the collectibles on his desk that made it look just like any other person's desk.  
It made her wonder who he really was, what he liked and enjoyed.  
Most of the time his personality seemed to get swallowed by the ingenius intellect that was the actual reason why he was bored and annoyed and impatient: Because there was nothing that could challenge his mind.

But all that wasn't really him.  
She knew that beyond this surface of the bored genius there was a very caring, sensitive and surprisingly insecure man to whom it already seemed to be an insolvable challenge to pick out the right clothes to wear on a date, to find the right words on the phone with his parents, to make the right move at the right time to show someone that he cared.  
He always hid behind his mind knowing that it would chase most people away so that he wouldn't have to face this insecurity that was a problem he couldn't approach on an intellectual level.

But there were few people who wouldn't let go of him because they saw their challenge in him.  
If only for once he could allow these people to emotionally challenge him, too, instead of refusing to let them in or chasing them away.

She looked at the envelope she had put on his desk and hoped he would accept the deal.

His cane bounced against the glass door that flew open and made her look up at him.  
His eyes were fiercely blue and unmistakably told her that she was not what he had wanted to find in his office, on his chair, behind his desk.  
When had that changed ?  
She remembered a time when she had seen his eyes lighting up at the first sight of her in the mornings.

"What are you doing here ?" he barked at her and she got up.

"Got something for you", she replied, her voice shaky and hoarse and with that alluring touch again, he noticed.

She suppressed a smile when she saw that he was curiously looking at the envelope she picked up from his desk. She stretched out her hand and waited for him to come closer to take the envelope from her.  
It felt like luring a wild animal out of its cave.  
Finally he laid his cane on the table and took the envelope.

He frowned when he looked at the ticket.

"Cuba", he stated and looked up at her, finding her smiling at him, again. "Why do you always send me out of the country ?" he asked. "Or did the Communists 'ask' you to sent me there to cure the 'Comandante' ? And by 'asking' I mean, did they buy you over with a life-long supply of extra large Cuban cigars ?"

"I thought it was a nice reference to that last case", she said, ignoring half of his words. "You seem to be quite famous over there. Maybe it's time for you to meet your fans before more of them try to swim here for a consult."

She had tried to sound light, joking and honest, but it hadn't really come out that way. She knew he could sense the hint of guilt in her voice.  
And that weariness.  
She was so incredibly tired of dealing with him, because it was nothing more than Sisyphus work. Nothing ever seemed to change between them.

"You mean instead of staying here as the PPTH's most unwanted employee I should go where my presence is actually being appreciated ? Bet there's one hell of a party getting launched to celebrate my departure. Are you gonna be the girl jumping out of the cake ?"

She shook her head in defense.

"Don't be such a drama queen. No one's trying to get rid of you. It's a vacation."

She lowered her gaze and softened her voice again. "Besides...you always wanted to go to Cuba."

There was something very intimate to these words, because she probably knew him better than they both were aware of : She was right. He had always wanted to go to Cuba.

He looked around and let his gaze wander through his deserted office. A place he had found himself feeling at home in, feeling safe. And somehow now he felt betrayed, with the enemy standing behind his desk, offering him a deal he couldn't refuse. Friends always had the potential to turn into the most dangerous enemies.  
It was pretty obvious that she had something on her mind and he wondered whether he should play along or not. Playing along would be different. And he had found a whole new appreciation for different, lately.

"You're such a bad liar", he said and she flinched, startled and guilty.  
"You're way too mad at me to be rewarding me with a ticket to the white sandy beaches of Cuba. You do wanna get rid of me. To secretly yarn your net inside here. You evil conspirer !"

She looked at him, caught, embarrassed, not knowing what to say.

"This is the only time you can do this, becaue your department is down anyway", she evaded cautiously. "You do deserve this vacation." And so do I, she added to herself. "You worked hard."

Her gaze dwelt on his lips as she raised her eyebrow.

"Now admit it already, I know you wanna go there", she teased him and let out a sigh of relief when she saw that he smiled.

Even though it was an evil smile. He was not naïve, he knew that she wouldn't be sitting around kicking her heels while he was going on that trip.  
But to her surprise he kept the ticket and stuffed it into the pocket of his leather jacket.

"I like it when you get all naughty and conspirative", he finally said slyly and took his cane from the table. "But don't expect me to send you a postcard."

He turned away with an expressionless face and a threatening glint in his eyes.  
But he was calm and peaceful when he left.

Her eyes followed him pensively.

"You got a week", she shouted after him when he was halfway out his office.

But he didn't even turn around.

"You should at least try to enjoy it !" she added more to herself and sank into his chair, brooding about him.

She had been wrong about him. He hadn't changed at all. He had been rude, grumpy and superior as always.  
He was still House.  
But something _had _changed.

After a while she got up.  
She had no time to waste.


	3. Blue

_III. Blue __  
_  
Another week later

The way she walked by, knowing that numberless eyes were following her, reminded him of Cuddy.  
Of course, he had never seen her in an outfit like this. At least not in reality.

The playful elegance in the movements of her slender tanned body along with that winning smile on her face as she was chatting on her cell phone, probably not seeing but knowing that everyone on this beach was staring at her, was exactly what caught people's attention.

It was the same with Cuddy. People looked at her when she entered the room.  
And it wasn't just her blue eyes, or her long shiny curls, neither was it her outfits.  
What really caught peoples' attention was that self-awareness, this astounding confidence that made everyone around her look grey and small. She knew that she had this effect on others and she had learned to play with it in a most cunning and at the same time charming way that seemed so natural and true. And in her case he knew it was natural. Even when he woke her up in the middle of the night, caught her in the most unvaforable outfits, she still had this aura of almost unhuman elegance.

His blue eyes followed the girl, wandered down on her back, focussed on the flower pattern on her bikini that lay loosely on her swaying hips.  
The turquoise water was splashing against her ankles with every wave that hit the beach.

It was a calm, clear ocean today that carried the deep blue of a night sky, while the sky was wearing the light color of crystal waters.  
He narrowed his eyes.  
The thin line where the surface of the ocean merged into the sky had exactly the color of her eyes, he thought.

It was funny that he hadn't thought of Cuddy a single time during the whole week.

Until now.

He had to admit that he had really enjoyed the vacation in his own way.

His attention returned to the other people on the beach as the girl was out of his sight, and then back to the book lying in his lap.

But Cuddy stayed on his mind.

So he closed his eyes and leaned back in his chair, letting the sun dry the salty drops of sweat on his forehead, breathing in the warm breeze coming from the ocean, knowing that it would be over soon.  
Which made this moment even sweeter, though. Because of its transience.  
Cuddy was probably restructuring the whole department right now and he was looking forward to snafu it all again at his return. Driving her crazy was so much fun, but it was getting harder as she was adjusting. So he had to adjust, too.

He opened his eyes again and smiled.

All he could see was that thin blue line on the distant horizon, where the ocean kissed the sky.

At the same time

Cuddy looked at the young man, hardly listening to him, getting lost in the blue of his eyes.  
She hadn't seen this kind of blue for days since the heavy rain clouds had been darkening the sky the whole week.

But it wasn't his eyes that reminded her of House. It was his whole attitude. The monosyllabism in which he answered her questions as if he wasn't at all interested in getting this job.  
Cuddy frowned and leant back in her chair, folding her hands on her stomach, eyeing him from head to toe.  
He wasn't even wearing a tie and his shirt was somewhat wrinkled.

She sighed. Why would she want to hire a second House ?  
Especially since she had already hired three new fellows, she didn't even need another one.

"Dr. O'Flaherty, why do you think should I hire you ?" she finally asked him coolly and absolutely unimpressed by his cocky attitude.

The young doctor shrugged his shoulders. His left eyelid twitched. Giving away that, in fact, he was a lot less relaxed than he was trying to look.

"Because I am the best man for this job. I have no private life, I have no hobbies, no friends. No interests other than my cases", he simply replied.

Cuddy nodded and smiled. "Well, that applies to most of the people who work here, myself included. Is there anything else that separates you from the others ?"

"You mean grades ? International exchanges ? Awards ?"

"No. I mean personality", she retorted coldly and the young man hesitated.

His answer was just as poor as the rest of the interview but it wasn't the words that convinced her that she needed to hire him. It was his whole appearance.

He was in fact, like the younger version of House, he was just like the Greg House she had met in Michigan over fifteen years ago. She knew House would hate this guy just as much as she did and that was exactly what he needed.  
He needed people who stood up to him, who challenged him, who were not boring because they had complex personalities, who stirred things up inside him, too, who were in a way a reflection of his own inner self.  
And this young doctor was hiding his true personality behind this wall of arrogance.  
He was damaged and carried some of that misery inside him that also seemed to master House.

Though, actually, she suddenly realized that she hadn't seen any of that misery in House lately.

Why did that worry her ?


	4. Power play

_IV. Power play_

The next day

"I'm not going to work with the Scooby-Doo kids. What drugs were you on when you hired those four clowns ?"

Cuddy looked up having anticipated this the whole morning, actually surprised that he was coming to her so late.  
She almost gasped when she saw him.

"You. Look good !" she spat at him in disbelief and noticed a skip in her heartbeat, telling her that she had actually missed him.

His eyes seemed even fiercer now that he was tanned. And they stared at her furiously.

"I knew you were going to do this behind my back. But I didn't know you had such bad knowledge of human nature."

"Well, I hired you. You should know better", she shot back and he came closer.

She remained seated, looking up at him when he stopped in front of her desk.  
For a second she could have sworn she could smell the coconut scent of tanning lotion but then she was certain she had just imagined it.  
But something was different about him, something other than the tan.  
Was it still that high-spirited happiness that seemed to have taken over him, that made him act like a defiant teenager gone wild ?

"They have to go. I'm not going to work like this", he repeated and she shrugged her shoulders.

"Guess you have to unless you wanna work elsewhere. Did you leave your resumé with the Cubans ?" she retorted dryly and he frowned, not sure whether she was really willing to fire him.

Something about her had changed. But he didn't know what it was.  
Where were that harshness in her voice and the stone cold look in her eyes coming from ?

"Are you seeing anybody ?" he suddenly asked her out of nowhere and she instantly shot back.

"No ? Why ?"

"Cause you're suddenly so bossy."

She looked at him in bewilderment and he explained himself.

"After throwing a hundred million dollars down the drain, committing perjury in court and sending me on a Caribbean vacation on hospital costs this harshness seems a little out of the blue."

She folded her hands and placed them on her desk looking up at him with exactly that kind of self-awareness that he had thought of on the beach the day before.

"You can't just rampage around your department like a stubborn child, arbitrarily firing staff members and expect me to tolerate it."

"You usually do", he retorted and she gave him a condescending look.

"You might not have noticed it because your ego seems to spoil the view on anything else than yourself in the mirror but this is actually a hospital. Here it's all about the patients and their wellbeing, it's not about you."

House pulled a face. "Really ? That's odd. I always thought this was all about the money. At least you can't tell me you're wearing these tops for the patients, cause that would be so totally inappropriate", he mocked her.

"You wanted a change. I wanted a change. This _is_ the change. So you either deal with this or –"

"Or what ?" he interrupted her.

"You're free to leave anytime", she answered, surprised at the cold sincerity in her voice.

He seemed just as surprised as she was because he had nothing to say in return.  
Instead he straightened up and nodded silently.  
They exchanged wild stares until he smiled and pointed his finger at her.

"You _are_ seeing someone."

She snorted.

"Why ? Cause I'm suddenly not folding to your sad puppy look anymore ?"

Again, she was surprised at the convincing coldness she could say all this with. But it seemed to work.  
Because the stern expression on his face suddenly melted away and he averted his gaze insecurely.

"You know I can't leave. This is all I have", he said, almost meekly, for the first time in weeks looking miserable.

She stared back at him, blankly.  
Apparently she had underestimated her power over him. There was one thing that meant something to him.  
She closed her eyes, trying to swallow the lump in her throat.  
And for a moment they both remained silent, two loners trapped inside their usually well-guarded feelings.

"Well, then maybe it's time you prove that you acknowledge that", she finally replied in a much softer tone.

He nodded again, still not being able to look at her, and turned around to leave her office, his silence saying more than he had ever said to her before.

And she sighed, not feeling proud at all although she had won this power play.  
She had been unreasonably cold to him knowing that he hadn't changed at all.  
That in fact, he had just changed the rules of the game because the old game hat turned out to get boring.  
He had won against Tritter, he had won against her by making her commit perjury for him, he had won against Foreman and Chase.  
So he had started pushing the boundaries. And people had left, without any effect on him.

The only thing that really got to him was taking away his mind games and that lay in her hands.  
Therefore his life somehow lay in her hands, too.

And for the first time, they both had become aware of that.

She rested her cheek in her cold hand and leaned on her desk, shaking her head wearily.

For some reason this break hadn't had the expected effect on either of them.  
They both were tense around each other, even more than before.  
Especially she was.

What was happening to them ?


	5. All zen

_V.All zen __  
_  
One week later

"A costume party ? God, this has to be a midlife crisis !" her voice suddenly emerged from somewhere and he turned around in his chair and looked at her, sassy as always, yet perfectly calm.

"You told me I should show my appreciation for my work and colleagues. And there's nothing more delightful than spending some quality time with dear co-workers. Proper social gathering for the greater good, little intellectual intercourse along with the revelation of people's true personality seeing them dress up as Sergeant Floyd Pepper and Rizzo the Rat. 100 dollars that Cameron will show up as Snow White."

He looked at her sheepishly and indulged in her bewilderment.

"You comin' ? Can bring that new boyfriend of yours", he asked her boyishly.

She frowned and rested her hand on her hip, leaning on his desk with her other hand.

After their encounter in her office he hadn't said anything else in this matter, instead, he had silently accepted his four new fellows and hadn't said a word about the two new departments she had given to two of his former fellows.

"Are you inviting Chase and Cameron, too ?" she therefore asked him, not having the slightest clue about what was going on on his mind and he nodded.

"Well, you gotta keep an eye on the competition", he simply replied but it was clearly evident that he was pouting and working on a strategy to get back at her for abusing her power over him.

She straigthened up with a knowing look on her face and smiled.

"So you're accepting the changes ?" she asked him suspiciously.

He shrugged his shoulders.

"I'm all zen", he simply said and turned away from her to focus on the MRI he had been looking at on the computer screen when she had come into his office.

Cuddy sighed and shook her head. Up to now she didn't know what his plan was, but it certainly promised not to turn out the way she hoped it would.

"God, you were easier when you were not zen", she hissed and turned around to leave him alone in his new calmness.

He leaned back and stared blankly at the MRI.

A smile rose on his lips.

He felt hazy. But this time he knew it wasn't the antidepressants. What was it then ?


	6. All in

_VI. All in_

Three days later

The smoke of the cigars he had brought back from Cuba was clouding his vision.  
But somehow everything looked nicer through that hazy curtain. Everything was more distant as if none of that was really part of his life. It couldn't reach him.

He had rented a private room adjacent to the casino and lounge of the only decent hotel in New Jersey. They were serving edible food and made sure no one ever ran low on their cocktails and they had a giant round poker table with green soft felt all to themselves.  
The voices from the guests in the lounge next door and the soft piano music were a soothing murmur in the background and House was surprised that everyone was there.  
Everyone except Foreman and Cuddy, who had called that she would be late.

House's eyes focussed on his cards as he was trying to sort this out.

Why was no one bothered by this sudden change in his M.O. ?  
He himself was highly alarmed by the unusual conformity of his behavior because that wasn't him.  
But everybody else thought that he was doing fine, because if he behaved like a normal human being, he conclusively had to be one.  
Meaning in reverse that if he behaved like a miserable asshole, he naturally had to feel miserable, too.  
But in his case it was the other way around.  
He behaved like that because he felt strange. He felt calm. And he felt calm because he felt nothing. Not even miserable. Though, he did feel mildly cocky and strangely free, which was why he didn't even care that he was losing this poker game.  
Now was that still a late effect of the antidepressants Wilson had put him on secretely behind his back ?

That moment the door opened and Cuddy entered.

Eight pairs of eyes stared at her in disbelief and she stared back.  
House grinned and heard Wilson hiding his amusement behind an awkward cough. Chase turned back at the table smirking and even Cameron had trouble remaining serious, pressing her lips together, staring at the green felt of the table.  
Someone chuckled.

The expression on Cuddy's face showed the astonishing evolution from a puzzled look to a furious glare in his direction resuming in that confident elegance of total indifference he usually saw on her face.

She was the only one wearing a costume, because she had been the only one who had received an invitation to a costume fest. All the others had been invited to a poker night.

But she wouldn't be Cuddy if she didn't know how to deal with a situation like this.  
She was used to humiliation.  
So she approached the table with a winning smile on her face and sat down next to Wilson who had reserved a seat for her and was throwing an acknowledging "You-my-friend-are-in-serious-trouble"-look at House when she wasn't paying attention.

House suppressed a smile and looked at her, hardly being able to hide his fascination.

"Hm", he finally managed to comment on her costume. "I actually thought you'd come as the Queen of Hearts. Or as the Wicked Witch of the West at least. But Queen Elizabeth the First ? That's just so predictable."

She threw an unimpressed look at him and he nodded.

"So what are you drinking ? Bloody Mary ?"

"You're such a joker", she said sarcastically and picked up her set of cards, playfully arranging them between her fingers, glancing at House every once in a while, firing acid stares at him.

House blew the smoke of his cigar into the air and realized that this evening had just reached its climax.

There were four women sitting at this table, Cameron, Queen Elizabeth I. and two of the new fellows Cuddy had hired. But despite their own natural beauty three of them were now no longer existent to House because Cuddy's presence was so overwhelming.  
House wondered once more why she had that effect.  
In this case it would have been easy to blame it on the costume. Or on the fact that she was their boss.  
But it was more than that.  
Hence, House used her undivided attention on her cards to unhinderedly study her. Not just her face, where she got cute little wrinkles between her eyebrows when she had a bad hand, but her whole appearance.

She had certainly put a lot of work into that costume and he wondered how she could even breathe with that tight corset that looked like it was trying to make her breasts either fall out or explode any minute. Even her hair was swept up with a hat-like ugly but very in-style crown on top of it from which a thick white pearl was dangling down on her forehad.

He smiled.  
All this effort for his little party ?

But at the same time she smiled to herself, too.  
Because he had obviously put some thought into organizing a poker night that turned out to be a very nice evening that made them all forget some of their worries for a while. He had done that even though he obviously hated most of the people sitting at the table with him.  
Why ? What was wrong with him ?

An hour later

House leaned back and checked his watch impatiently. Cuddy had been gone for almost fifteen minutes now. Whoever had called her obviously didn't know anything about manners to interrupt her when she was finally having a key hand in this poker game.  
He looked at Wilson who was eagerly concentrating on the game, looking strained as he rubbed his forehead thoughtfully.  
They were all losing, this Irish whippersnapper was beating the pants off them all.  
He put his cards on the table and got up.

"I'm out", he stated and left the round to look for Cuddy.

She had left the table when someone had started calling her on her cell phone over and over again and had vanished behind a door that led to another private party room.

He found her leaning against the wall of the low-lit deserted room.  
Apart from the cell phone she was holding up to her ear with her right hand she really did look like a queen in that magnificent voluminous dress. In her left hand she was holding her stiff scratchy Elizabeth collar she had taken off a while ago and played around with it absent-mindedly. Her curls had started falling out of that updo she had forced her hair into, making her look a lot softer and more Queen Anne-like. Which was a much less scary picture, he had to admit.

She flinched and straightened up when she noticed that he had entered.

"Listen. I really need to go. Call me if there's any more problems", she quickly cut the person on the phone off and hung up.

"You're really falling out of your role using that ghost machine from the future", he told her off and she smiled at him.

"This is nice", she almost whispered, her eyes sparkling from the Martini she had allowed herself. "You did good. Even if it's awkward, it's a change for the better. Shows that you're after all human."

In fact, she didn't know whether she really liked this change since she had no idea where it was leading to.

He looked at her somberly. "Well, I guess you left me no choice."

"I never told you to change", she instantly replied.

"Yah, but even your patience has it's limits. You're getting older, too. There'll be a day when you will fire me. We both know that."

She looked at him, puzzled. Her lips parted but she held her breath.

For the first time in her life she had no idea who he was at that moment and she was pretty sure that he had no idea either. He appeared so vulnerable and defenseless and she wondered why.

"You know I'd never fire you", she finally said lackadaisically.

House nodded and looked away. Of course he knew that.

They were both trying to find back into their old roles that had made everything so simple.  
Where she would yell at him, bossing him around, always getting his insulting snark in return but knowing he would do the right thing in the end anyway.  
It was their game.  
But somehow this didn't feel like playing anymore. This felt serious.  
Maybe they were getting old. Maybe they were tired.  
Or maybe they were finally accepting things.

"So, you're going home to your boyfriend now?"

She snorted cynically and shrugged her shoulders.

"Why do you care ?"

There was so much annoyance in her voice all of a sudden.  
And then slowly the reason for that dawned on him.  
It had been in the balance for a while now and it was incredibly tiring to leave it unanswered, apparently especially for her.  
That was the real reason for this tension between them. Because it had come to a complete standstill.  
The game was over and he was out because he had waited too long.

His grip around the round knob of his tuxedo cane tightened as he looked at her.

"I like you."

Again, she snorted, but with a bewildered look on her face.

"No you don't."

With these words she turned away towards the door.  
But suddenly she felt something strangely unfamiliar happening: She felt his fingers gently closing around her wrist, holding her back, keeping her from leaving the room.  
She turned around slowly, cautiously and stared down at his hand touching hers.  
A gesture that seemed so intimate, yet so distorting because it was coming from him.

The moment he realized just how much that freaked her out he let go and their eyes met.

A silent gasp emerged her lips.

"Wow", she whispered wordlessly and didn't know whether to smile or to run away.  
"This really _is_ a crisis, isn't it ?" she found herself repeating, but he remained silent.

She approached him when he avoided eye contact and now it was her who reached out for his hand.

"Are you okay ?" she asked him softly, relieved that she finally knew that her instincts had been right: Something was wrong with him, had been wrong before she had sent him on his vacation.  
This really wasn't him. And it wasn't over, whatever it was.

He shrugged his shoulders and stared at her hand that was awkwardly holding his.  
They were so incredibly out of practice, he noticed. Because they hardly ever touched and when they did it felt strange, because it hurt. Just like now. It carried too many reminiscences of a night when there hadn't been a single inch of skin that had been left untouched by the other one's hands.

His skin seemed to burn under her touch.

"I don't know", he finally replied and looked up at her. "Am I ?"

She bit her lip when she understood how lost he was in himself.  
Though when she looked back up at him she saw a glint of happiness in his eyes that made her shiver. Apparently he was okay, somehow, she stated confusedly and let go of his hand, adjusting the silk handkerchief in his tux pocket – a sweet little displacement activity.  
She let her hand glide down his chest thoughtfully before she looked at him again.

"Let's go back inside. It's your party", she said, leaving his question dangling in the air, unanswered like so many other things between them and turned away.

This wasn't the right time, ironically it never was.

"I'm out anyway. That new guy you hired is winning. He's smart", he said and followed her when she opened the door back to the party room.

"No", she contradicted childishly. "You're in again. I'm the Queen. I just changed the rules."

When she saw the faces looking at them from the poker table she thought of themselves as a unity, a strange pairing that shared a secret no one else at that table knew.

And then she understood what was happening to them.

They were falling in love.

Again.


End file.
